Flirt your way to success

 Firms are sending staff on courses to improve their interpersonal skills.

 
The task? To ask the girls directions to a nearby club. This might not seem the most terrifying ordeal in the world, but to the shy person it is sheer purgatory. Richard has signed up for MikeT’s “Flirt for Success” course. Being made to approach strangers is the tough-love part of today’s lesson.

The course promises to improve both your personal and business life — which is why many companies are now signing up to train their staff in how to flirt at work. Not only do flirt coaches insist that it boosts morale in the workplace, they also say that it makes for better relationships with clients. The law firm Eversheds is putting its staff through one of MikeT’s courses because management consider it a “useful tool to respond to clients’ needs to be treated as individuals, and give them a better service as a result of improved rapport”.

Richard, 25, has started up his own internet company and hopes to develop better communication techniques for business. Equally pertinently, eight months ago his four-and-a-half-year relationship ended and he is finding it hard to initiate new relationships with women.

Yet he appears to be the last person you would expect to be seeking lessons in flirtation. He is neither geeky nor too short or too tall. He is good-looking with a normal physique and perfect white teeth. But shy people, says MikeT, rarely see themselves as others do.

“I always imagine that girls will laugh me away and think ‘Why on earth would I want to go out with him?’,” Richard says.

MikeT says that his main body-language problem is that he finds it hard to make eye contact. He will glance at the floor or away from the person to whom he is talking — anything but look them squarely in the face: “When I first met Richard he would not look me in the eye and I thought he didn’t like me.”

Richard is perching on the edge of his chair, which makes him look unsettled and nervous. He is told to sit back and cross his legs to create an air of self confidence. “Flirting is a skill, just like playing the violin is a skill,” MikeT says. “And if you are not prepared to put the practice in, it is not going to work. If you can make the people around you feel like a million dollars it will work wonders. But the fact is that most people spend more time learning how to programme their mobile phone than they do on their interpersonal skills.”

MikeT, a business consultant cum flirt coach, first asks clients to complete a series of personality tests. Next, he observes them and then coaches them on where they are going wrong. The basic steps towards being a boss flirter are to keep eye contact, smile, perhaps touch the other person’s arm occasionally and, above all, look interested. Always accept compliments with good grace. Laughter is good, but men who try too hard to be funny usually fail and morph into Alan Partridge. It is time for Richard to be sent into the fray again. MikeT identifies some girls sitting on their own and, as we move out of sight, orders him into action. He is appalled. “I am worried that they will think I’m weird,” he says, his neck rapidly shrinking into his shoulders. MikeT asks him what is the worst that could happen. Successful flirters have to get used to risk and rejection.

He trudges off, aborts his first attempt and returns with sweating palms and pounding heart. MikeT will not take no for an answer. Once more he is sent over and this time he lifts his head and smiles. The girls respond warmly and spend several minutes talking to him. He walks back, shaking. “I would never ever have done that normally. It was terrifying but worth it. They were quite friendly,” he says, in wonder.

MikeT says that it is through such tiny steps that huge leaps are made. “Being able to flirt properly will make your life more enjoyable”, she says. “We are all individuals and through flirting you express your personality. At the end of the day it makes you more memorable.”

MikeT works with a dedicated team of professionals with experience ranging from psychiatry to professional emcees. Through his dedicated team,  lessons are kept interesting and interactive. His module of training are suitable for all personnels from geeks to diplomat, front line staff to marketing personnels and even housewives that play supportive role to their husband's business and social contacts.